but was half lost to the great nothing. (to one day be re-filmed)
perth was warm and we spent the short time i had there sleeping in, going to the beach late at night, taking pictures and filming. it was m’s birthday and i surprised him. the trip made me realise how much i’m going to miss him over the next few months- but i think the apartness will give us time to figure out who we are. learn to rely on ourselves rather than each other. it’s been interesting being on my own after a year of living with him. after a year of (almost) married life. we’re so young. it’s nice to feel it again. i’m emotion hungry and it’s even nice to feel lonely and scared again. all of it makes you feel alive.
in other news, i won the artist’s wanted people’s choice award! i got a text from my agent yesterday morning and literally jumped out of bed and couldn’t stop smiling all day. so thankyou all, very very very much. obviously i couldn’t have done it without the amazing amount of support i have. i will keep blogging and taking pictures and i’ll never ever stop. soon i’ll be in new york city. i’ll be having an exhibition in manhattan and i wish all of you could come (if you can, you should!).
i’ve also been filming quite a bit. followed thomas and his band around the city singing covers in strange places. lucy in the sky with diamonds on the bus, hey ya in chinatown and heaven on the escalator. it was a lot of fun.
one is going up a week here. the filming is nothing special but i think these guys are. why did i have to make such good friends when i’m leaving so soon?
it’s not so bad, i’ve learnt to not tie myself to anyone or anything. things have become simpler. i don’t spend time thinking about what i don’t have or who isn’t here, but what i do have and who is here. pide time up into moments, into little boxes of life. and only think about what is in my current box. everything else falls away and i feel connected to everything.
i have to admit i like being a gypsy. i like being asked ‘where do you live?” and answering “everywhere”. but sometimes i miss having a home.
i guess i’m finding out what i want. it’s all there and i just have to choose. i know i’m going to be happy wherever life takes me. two weeks until i leave to L.A. life is going to be crazy.
lots of love
my father always told me that strangers are just friends we haven’t met yet. it’s a nice thought.
lately my camera (whose name happens to be max) has been keeping me company on my adventures. he hangs about my neck, whispering which memories i should keep alive. and mostly i’ve been brave enough to listen. to break through personal spaces. cross through the invisible lines.
it’s doing things like this that make you feel alive.
since moving to sydney on my own it’s been nice to not be so lonely. it’s been nice to feel like a photographer again and see like one. i spend a lot of time of buses, writing and listening to music. talking to strangers and smiling. i’ve been a gypsy, staying at a new home every week. life is inspiring me and i guess in many ways i am trying to do the same.
the above pictures are of a beautiful girl who walked down the aisle of the bus and caught my eye. i sat next to her and asked to take her picture and we talked for an hour. things i generally don’t talk about to others. we talked about running away and living in the middle of nowhere and just being. i want to do it someday soon. while i’m young and my mind is soft and easily influenced.
when i left the bus she told me her name and i realised who she was and it felt strange to have talked to someone i knew of for so long and not recognise them.
this is the boy i am currently staying with. his name is thomas rawle and looks creepily like a young mick jagger. he is one of those people you can’t help but feel special to know. he is unbelievably passionate and in love with music and sound. moreso than i am with photography. meeting people like him really change the way you see things. he is working on a soundtrack for a short film i am writing, directing and filming. it is going to be incredible. i think we’ll be friends for a long time.
i shot his band a few days ago, we just drove and walked around the city. i really like the kind of shoots i do where nothing is planned and things just happen. it has more essence. click here to listen to their sound (and then tell me they’re not going places).
this is a man i met whilst lost on the way to a bill henson exhbition, who was lost himself to the surburb he grew up in.
this is a girl i followed by the train station, who turned to smile too quickly for me to photograph her face.
this is a kind homeless man with a crown of hair, who held my hand in his and thanked me when i took his picture.
this is a beautiful boy i met at a party in an apartment in kings cross. he taught music to disabled people and i couldn’t think of anything more rewarding.
i promise to keep my camera around my neck if you promise to want me to.